From The Producers one of the greatest comedies ever made:

STEP ONE: We find the worst play ever written, a surefire flop.

STEP TWO: I raise a million bucks. Lots of little old ladies out there.

STEP THREE: You go back to work on the books, two of them – one for the government, one for us.

STEP FOUR: We open on Broadway. And before you can say

STEP FIVE, we *close* on Broadway!

STEP SIX: We take our million bucks and fly to *Rio!*

Now replace “play” with “Course management software” or your favorite edtech reform thingy.

Replace “open” with “Announce.”

Replace “Broadway” with “Chronicle of Higher Education.”

Congratulations! Your higher ed news story for 2016 is written.

(I’m sorry. It is just one of those things that had to be written.)